You know you have been living in the States when...

the calendar starts on S (sunday) and ends on S (Monday)
inside its colder than outside
you cannot tell the bills apart and they dont fit in your purse
people talk at the same time instead of having a conversation
there is sports on TV in every bar, but they don't care about "soccer"
American guys laugh at the German soccer team although they can hardly play
they serve you beer without any foam :(
you can twist the beer cap to open it
everybody is eating everything with their fingers
girls basically don't eat
tip is required and waiters don't even try to be smiling
tax is not included
all guys who serve you are either African Americans or Asians
all young people who work for nothing are White Europeans
small and regular drinks and food are actually huge
large clothes and shoes are actually tiny
women change from flipflops to posh shoes in the elevator
it almost kills you while you are jumping within the doorframe
you realise toilet paper has a different shape
toilets are closer to the ground as if ppl were tinier
you just D.C. (don't care :) )

please, help me continue if you can.
I'll update this post on a regular basis.